Today's Toons 5/22/17

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letter C:

 
In Case You Missed It Dept.:
 
New Orleans city workers Thursday hauled away the forty-foot-high statue of Jefferson Davis from a downtown park. The anguish could be felt all the way to Washington. All week long the Democrats have been yelling for the president's removal but they didn't mean for it to be a Democrat.
 
Senate Intelligence Committee Chairman Chuck Grassley revealed Thursday that the FBI told the committee Trump isn't under investigation for collusion with the Russians. That shouldn't spoil a good time. Nobody on Capitol Hill is going to object if Democrats call for a Special Prostitute.
 
Senate Democrats called for Jim Comey to be fired Tuesday morning and then that afternoon demanded President Trump be impeached for firing Jim Comey. It's a sickness. If Trump came out in favor of Obamacare, the Democrats would move to impeach him for colluding with Blue Cross.
 
President Trump explained his decision to fire Jim Comey in an interview with Lester Holt of NBC News. During the interview, Trump characterized the fired FBI director as a showboat and grandstander. He would have added drama queen, but of course there was only one J. Edgar Hoover.
 
President Trump ordered Homeland Security to block cyber-attacks that hit Europe Thursday, blacking out Britain's health care system. An attack in the U.S. could imperil hospital patient care and halt Trump from tweeting. After lengthy deliberations, Democrats decided that if they die, they die.
 
North Korea successfully tested a missile Saturday which experts say could reach Los Angeles with a nuclear warhead. It'd make great TV. The funniest thing about a nuclear attack on Los Angeles would be the tens of thousands of young people taking selfies in front of the mushroom cloud.
 
President Trump told Fox News Friday he enjoys being president but it's a wonder why. Every day brings a new call for a special prosecutor. The Washington Post quoted anonymous sources who say that Trump has been serving caviar at White House dinners, and caviar is a known Russian product.
 
The Miss USA Pageant was won by a beautiful black nuclear chemist, Kara McCullough, over the weekend. Her conservative views during the interviews upset the media. She may be the first beauty pageant contestant in history to say that world peace just didn't work out the way we'd hoped.
 
Senate Democrats vowed to stall the new FBI director confirmation until a special prosecutor is named. The president is leaving Washington D.C. Friday for the relative peace and calm of the Middle East. How bad is it on Capitol Hill when Trump has to book a room in Mosul for some R&R?
 
The New York Times reported President Trump asked James Comey to drop the FBI probe of Mike Flynn in February and added that Comey heroically refused. It never ends. Trump should re-nominate Jim Comey as FBI Director just to watch the Democrats change positions on him again.
 
President Trump weighed the idea of canceling daily press briefings Friday due to all the press vitriol toward him. They make him look pretty bad. CNN anchors always close out their Friday broadcasts by saying Donald Trump has just had the worst week of his political career until next week.
 
Trump stood by confiding in Russia about ISIS plans to down airliners despite all the partisan rage. This is why nobody likes us. Build a wall to keep out foreigners and Republicans will elect you president, and save foreigners from being shot down in an airliner and Democrats will impeach you.
 
-- Argus Hamilton
 
Hillary Clinton is forming a group called Onward Together, a political organization that is anti-Trump. Experts are calling it bold, ambitious, and six months too late.
 
-- James Corden