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Author Topic: Today's Toons 2/26/18  (Read 172 times)
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pookie18
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« on: February 26, 2018, 04:38:54 am »

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letter C:

 
In Case You Missed It Dept.:
 
President Trump's lawyer Michael Cohen said he paid Stormy Daniels one hundred and forty grand hush money before the election about an old fling the porn star claimed with Trump. What a close call. Had she told her story before Election Day, Trump could have carried New York and L.A.
 
Barack Obama officiated at the unveiling of his presidential portrait at the National Gallery in Washington. He seems very confident about his popularity with the voters. To this day, Barack Obama thinks that he could beat Donald Trump with one of his birth certificates tied behind his back.
 
The Huffington Post says Michelle Obama gave Barack a Spotify playlist of his favorite music for Valentine's Day. The reaction to her new portrait at the National Gallery is mixed. I saw the unveiling of Michelle's official portrait and for the first time in my life I'm proud of Paint-by-Number.
 
Politico said Democrats will keep Bill Clinton off the campaign trail this fall due to Me, Too sensitivities. What an insane waste of talent. Obama's portrait was just unveiled at the National Gallery, and it will hang next to Bill Clinton's portrait, which is on top of Jackie Kennedy's portrait.
 
North Korean dictator Kim Jung Un appeared on the palace balcony with his wife Ri Jo-Li last weekend to show support for their Winter Olympics team. The couple was recently married in a lavish wedding ceremony. Afterwards the guests threw rice from the nation's sole remaining bushel.
 
Russia's Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov dismissed Mueller's indictment as blabber. It claims Russian tried to turn social media into Democratic-Republican killing fields, and they succeeded. In today's world you can post a photo of your potato salad and some people will question your politics.
 
Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas forecasted American society will soon become weary of people playing the victim card for public attention. However we'll never grow short of lawyers willing to sue on behalf of the insulted. Just be yourself is the worst advice you can give some people.
 
Abraham Lincoln was named our greatest president in a poll of political scientists on President's Day. They listed Trump dead last. He divided the nation, he incited bitter hatred from Democrats, he raised protective tariffs and made the leading actors of his day want to kill him, and so did Trump.
 
President Trump ripped Oprah on Twitter for using her CBS 60 Minutes segment on Sunday to badger a roundtable of Trump supporters with slanted questions. He must be nicer to her. The CIA uses the All Oprah All the Time Sirius XM radio station to torture the prisoners at Guantanamo.
 
The Weather Channel reported freak weather on the Eastern Seaboard and West Coast with record-warm weather in New York and record-cold weather in California. How bad is it? It's so cold in Los Angeles that people are saying nice things about Trump just for the heated response.
 
-- Argus Hamilton
 
 
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